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Thursday, December 27, 2012

Back pain & when it might be serious!


One of the common complaints for women during that last trimester is back pain. Weight gain, muscle separation, stress and posture changes are all contributing factors. The sciatic nerve is typically the main source of pain, and often there is no comfortable position to be in. Sleep because increasingly difficult, as well as getting around in general. 

So when does it become serious? Let me start off by telling you that anytime your quality of life is being affected it may be time to speak up and be an advocate for yourself. If you had back pain or issues before getting pregnant this also should be a red flag that something is not right. Talk to your OB and if need be, consult an orthopedic surgeon.

Here is my story...

When I was 17 I was in a pretty nasty car accident and was left with a bulging disc in the L4/L5 area. I was told at the time that this was a degenerative disease that could get progressively worse over time. I was instructed to do my best to keep fit and strengthen my leg and abdominal muscles to support my lower back. So with my first pregnancy there was a little more back pain then I imagine the average woman might go through. However with my second, things were much worse. 

I was well into my second trimester when the sciatica was flaring up... numbness in the legs, pain in the lower back and many sleepless nights. I did my best to walk, stretch and do prenatal yoga- but in the end we believe that may have made things worse. I was in the middle of doing yoga when a pain in my back surged through my body so bad that it made me physically ill and I nearly fell to the floor! For days I couldn't even walk. Once I could finally get up I decided to go see a chiropractor, my second mistake according to my orthopedic surgeon. No relief was provided when seeing the chiropractor, but he did turn me on to Biofreeze and icing which helped some.   

My OB kept telling me that this was most likely just the pregnancy and that once the weight came off I would get better... this was not the case. Once I had my daughter the pain seemed to get worse so that is when I went to see specialists. The bulging disc had actually herniated, and the framework around it was collapsing so to speak. I was beyond the help of Physical Therapy so we tried pain management. By the time my daughter was 5 months old I could barely walk. I was in such horrific pain that I couldn't even carry the diaper bag or car seat. Mornings were the worst; my bones and muscles surged with pain and ached to the core. I was on enough pain medication to kill a small animal- and my quality of life was affected greatly.

So in May 2011, 9 months after giving birth I underwent a bone fusion surgery, I was terrified to say the least. It was a 4-hour surgery that would leave me on bed rest for at least two weeks. I wasn't allowed to hold my baby for the first 6-8 weeks and it was long summer of rehabilitation. The worst of it all is that there was no guarantee this would fix the problem, but for me there was no other choice.

Things seemed to be getting better after several months, but then quickly started to deteriorate again. I still have little sensation in my left leg. I can only sit, walk and stand for short periods of time and there is still a great deal of pain. Sleeping is still very difficult for me, only and hour or so at time and then I need to get up to move my joints. We have monitored the fusion closely and as of 3 months ago the fusion had begun but was wafer thin. 

I write this for the same reason I wrote the article on my breast-feeding experience.  Be your own advocate!!! If something is not feeling right, be persistent until someone listens- meanwhile listen to your own body. I am not saying to avoid physical activity when pregnant, matter of fact motion helps keep things loose. Just be careful if you are experiencing pain, and have a specialist take a look before a chiropractor does! 

When the flare-ups are bad, try ice or heat for 20 minutes every 40 minutes or so. Biofreeze was great at penetrating to the muscles as well so get a tube of that from your local pharmacy. Keep feet elevated when possible, do yoga with a certified instructor when pregnant. Your center of gravity is off; your muscles are completely separated so play it safe! Swimming is really the best form of exercise in the third trimester! Low-impact and takes the weight of your joints and lower back. If pain is radiating down your legs, preventing you from doing any activity or you are experiencing numbness and tingling then it is time to call a doctor! 



J'aime la vie by Victoria Antoinette

Stephanie Antoinette
Founder & M.O.M. (Master of Multitasking) 

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Great gifts for expecting mom!!


With the holidays around the corner you may be wondering what to get that expecting mom you know. I have compiled a little list for great gifts, at varying price ranges to get your mom-to-be!


A great choice is always creams, lotions and oils, especially for that growing belly. Some of my favorites are Bio Oil and Mama Mio Tummy Rub Stretch Mark Oil. Mama Mio makes some great kits to purchase with a whole line of products moms need during pregnancy!

Diaper bags are a must have for every mom, so why not go with some fabulous and functional!!

Kate Spade's nylon striped STEVIE bag is absolutely adorable!! This bag gives you more then enough room for diapers, bottles, wipes, extra change of clothes and more! Not to mention its simple style goes with nearly anything... remember, mom will be carrying this around for a pretty long time! It cleans with ease, and comes with a changing pad! Another lovely choice are the Petunia Pickle bags, they come in different shapes, sizes and price ranges! My favorite, the City Carryall as seen below!




Not everyone is comfortable with giving a gift certificate, but in this case I think is great choice! Messages, manicures, pedicures, and facials are all things that a pregnant mom would love! Check out some local spas in your area and see what there is! I have some great recco's for the valley... so just give me a call.

Fun iphone and ipad covers make sweet gifts as well... Check out this Tory Burch Robinson tablet case! 






Here is a great phone cover from Kate Spade... this is just one of MANY they have and they are only $40.00!

For the bigger budget, jewelry is always the perfect choice!! I love the timeless look of the Helen Ficalora charm necklace as seen below!





Happy Holidays!!

J'aime la vie by Victoria Antoinette

Stephanie Antoinette
Founder & M.O.M. (Master of Multitasking) 





Thursday, December 6, 2012

Tips for traveling with kids this holiday!


It is that time of year again, the dreaded holiday travel... with kids in tow! Here are few helpful hints to make this a little easier on you, whether you are traveling by car or plane!

Have a set itinerary, this is not the time to 'wing it' or just go with the flow. Kids like routine, and when you are traveling it is good to set one. If at all possible try to leave earlier in the morning whether driving or flying. Children do not always sleep during transport so it is best not to put them in a position where they will lose sleep. A tired passenger is a recipe for disaster; they get cranky and are more susceptible to getting sick. Try to plan travel where you can still take advantage of a naptime and getting them to the destination before bedtime.

Have snacks and small toys/electronics/activity books in a bag that is within reach at all times! Try to avoid sugary snacks that will give your child a good old 'crash and burn' and go for something with a bit more substance. Gold Fish crackers, raisins, granola bars, fruit & veggie smoothie packets are all good choices. My favorites are Happy Tots- they are rich in vitamins and antioxidants and have options for babies and older kids! Check out their site:


Pack an extra change of clothes that is easily accessible in case there is an accident! Other must haves for your carry-on tote or car bag are; wipes, hand sanitizer, bottled water, gum (for the bigger kids), and Emergen C packs!! I swear by these... you should all take one before travel, during and when you reach your destination!

For games, toys, etc... Pack coloring books, crayons, small wipe board, books, activity book with stickers and the iPad! I do not leave my house without the iPad... it entertains my 13 year old just as much as my two year old. Load it with movies, and games- some of my favorite little kids apps are:




Traveling by plane is a little more difficult then car since you have the ear popping factor, and a much higher risk of getting sick! If you are breastfeeding, then try and feed right before you get on the plane. Bring an eyedropper and just before take off drop some breast milk in the baby's nasal cavity. This will help prevent ear popping and kill germs they breathe in. Breast milk is an excellent resource for that... also it will make the baby sneeze and sneezing is the body's was of rejecting germs. You can continue to administer the drops about every hour. If you are bottle-feeding then do feed before take off.  Depending on the age and doctors okay, I would give baby some Tylenol. It will help with the ear pain and possibly get the baby to sleep through the flight. For toddlers try warm milk, hot chocolate... any warmer liquid to help kill germs they breathe in. Make sure to sanitize their hands and face as much as possible! You can also give toddlers a little Tylenol or Benedryl to help them relax during travel whether plane or car!

This can be a stressful time for parents, try to remain calm and not get agitated with each other... it only makes things worse. We do our best as parents to keep our kids from screaming, tantrums, kicking the seat in front of them, etc... But every now and then you will have someone who gives you the glare. Don't let it get to you... everyone is a judge these days!!

Happy Travels!

J'aime la vie by Victoria Antoinette

Stephanie Antoinette
Founder & M.O.M. (Master of Multitasking) 





Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Organizing before the holidays!


If you are OCD like I am, then the holidays tend to come with a little more then 'cheer'... PANIC is more like it! The playroom and kid's rooms are already packed with toys, books and clothes shoved into every nook and cranny. Puzzle pieces, game pieces and more are all over the place, and not where they should be. Your two year old still has drawers crammed with baby clothes, so how can you possibly make room for what Santa is about to bring... and grandma in our case!





Doing a full on organization can be frustrating and extremely time consuming for some, that is why I offer this as a service! Trust me it is worth every penny :-) Here are some key tips to get you started, especially if you are going at this alone.

PURGE!!! Go into the war zone with 3 bins- Keep, Donate, Toss! This is not for the weak; you must be willing to let go of some of this stuff. If it is broken, missing pieces, or stained beyond fixing, then TOSS it! If it is in semi- good condition, but you will never use it then DONATE. There are several charities (I can help you find local ones) that are in desperate need of toys and clothes! Make sure your KEEP pile is not overflowing, and your other two piles have little to nothing. Be honest with yourself, in a couple weeks you won't even remember it.

Once you have established a KEEP pile, decide what you are keeping for daily use, what needs to be packed away for the future (like baby clothes and baby toys), and what you can rotate out every month or so. Kids are really "out of sight, out of mind" creatures. I like to rotate my little ones toys, every month or so it is like new toys for her! I like to use the vacuum seal packs for clothes and store them in closets or the garage. Cute bins like the ones below are fantastic to put toys and games in! You can line them on shelves, or under a bench in a playroom. Easy to pull out for play and clean up!




My mother use to always say "cluttered spaces mean a cluttered mind" and I could not agree more. Nothing feels more satisfying then an organized space. If you are on a budget you can find plastic bins and baskets at any Dollar store. These are great for medicines, crafts, crayons, coloring books and more! Make your spaces great!!



Call or email me for custom organization of any kids room, nursery or playroom!

J'aime la vie by Victoria Antoinette

Stephanie Antoinette
Founder & M.O.M. (Master of Multitasking) 


Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Party Flow & Etiquette~


There are two things you must keep in mind for any party at any budget, and that is Party Flow & Etiquette. We have become a society where everything is quick, fast, cheap and in a party, all of those tend to show. Hosting an event is not as easy as it looks, and there are some basic rules that must be followed! Remember, when you invite someone to your event they are taking time out of their day/evening to be there for you. Often they have purchased a gift, or even hired a sitter to come. Be mindful of that, and remember it is not all about you.






Party Flow~

Every party needs a timeline, especially children's birthdays and baby showers. For children birthdays make sure the party is an appropriate length of time... typically 2-3 hours for younger kids. Attention spans do not last, and the excitement can be overwhelming. Have an agenda to keep the kids engaged and the party moving along. There is nothing worse then parents trying to keep their child entertained at your party. Schedule games, crafts, activities, etc... Kids do well with routine and a good flow... and so do adults!









Party Etiquette~

I have been to quite a few events so feel free to call me 'old fashioned' but I am a stickler for proper party etiquette. If at all possible, do not book the parties for smaller children around lunchtime. At the 3 and under stage a child typically needs to nap after lunch, and missing that could turn into a disaster.  Whether you have hired an event planner or have a family or friend hosting, if this is a party for you, your child or at your home, you need to work the room! Make sure you take the time to say hello to each of your guests (assuming a party of 50 or under). Thank them for coming and introduce guests to one another. This creates good conversation and helps people relax at your event. Always send a thank you card to each and every guest after the event, thanking him or her for coming and if they brought a gift. A hand written thank you goes a long way do not skip this rule!



Make your event memorable, you can plan a great event on even the smallest of budgets if you remember these simple rules!


For party planning services & prices please call me!



Stephanie Antoinette
480-717-2795
www.JLVbebeconcierge.com

Sunday, November 11, 2012

The working mom...






One of the driving forces behind this business was that I was a working mom who barely had a spare moment to sleep, let alone accomplish anything else. I worked a lot of hours, and I was on call, nights & weekends. My free time was very valuable to me, and rarely did I want to spend it on interviewing nannies, planning birthday parties, organizing my own shower, finding a housekeeper, etc... I needed things done quickly, the right way and under budget. I also wanted to make sure I was getting with the right people, luckily for you; I have already done the trial and error. Had there been a service like mine while I was working, I would have signed up immediately!

For instance, 4 weeks before Ella was due I was planning a pool birthday party at our house for my oldest Kiana. I didn't want Kiana to feel her birthday was getting overlooked because we were about to have a baby. However, I was in NO CONDITION to put this together on my own... so I went in search of some help. I needed someone to clean our home, not only for the party but a deep clean before Ella came. So I searched online, and in the papers then finally decided on someone. It was a few days before the party and she was supposed to show up at 7am. After several calls, messages and freak-outs (on my end) she showed up at 2pm! Since I had somewhere to be a 4pm she only stayed for a couple of hours and then came back the next day to finish. Not only was she incredibly late, she did a horrid job and charged me about 30% more then what she advertised! She even left water stains on the tile!

Then came the research for a photographer... I didn't start looking until late in the pregnancy. Prices varied from 250 to 2500- in the end I knew none of them or their work so I did it myself. In the past couple of years I have made it a mission to find the best of the best, and I have! The pictures I took of Ella were ok, but sadly I wasn't in any of them. I should have learned the lesson of finding a good photographer from my wedding disaster- it just took me awhile to find the perfect ones.





As working moms we feel so much guilt... do we spend enough time with our family? Did I give my child the best birthday I could, what products am I supposed to buy, who can I trust my children to be left with while I work? These are real concerns that almost any mother faces, but especially those who spend the majority of their days away from their kids.

My concierge can provide mothers the resources, services and extra hand they need. What is best about this is you can be rest assured you will not have a disaster like I did. My vendors provide their services at a discounted price to my clients that you would not find if you sought them out directly. Not to mention all the time and effort it would take to compile a go-to list. J'aime la vie by Victoria Antoinette is your one-stop shop for all mommy and baby needs! I work with the valley's top florists, photographers, bakers, venues, and more to provide you whatever you need.


Stop stressing yourself out, take your free time back and hire me for all your needs! My services pay for it-self a hundred times over!

xx,
Stephanie Antoinette 


Friday, November 2, 2012

Be a true friend!


Having two children, 10 nieces and nephews and a surplus of friends with babies I have come to know a few things. One of the most important is to know how to really help out a new mother. Believe it or not, but a lot of friends and family think helping means "take care of the baby"... this is NOT HELPING A NEW MOTHER!! Mothers and fathers want this time to bond with their baby, what they need help is the other stuff. So if you are going to lend a hand, here are some basics to follow.

1. Bring food, preferably something that doesn't require much but opening and heating.

2. Wash your hands upon arrival, and only hold the baby when you are given permission.

3. Do not bring pets or sick children along with you.

4. Offer to help with laundry, cleaning, cooking... or just do it without asking.

5. Call before you come, sleep schedules are not consistent the first few months, so make sure you come during a time when baby and mom will be awake.

6. Do not stay long, typically when the mom says she going to put baby down that is your cue to leave. She is tired and needs to rest when the baby does.

7. This is not the time for you to tell mom that she is doing things incorrectly. If she chooses to bottle-feed then let her. Mothers have enough guilt to deal with on a daily basis, this is not the time to put your two cents in... unless asked!

8. If asked, be honest! Do not sugar coat things for her but let her know it gets easiest and every mom will find a system that works.

8. Make her a play list of good music to listen to while nursing!

9. Let her know that one day she will sleep again!

10. Tell she looks beautiful and that she is doing an awesome job!

11. Make sure to take a photo with her actually in it, candid moments are the best!! So many end up being of just the baby.








12. Offer to keep an eye on the baby if she would like to take a shower, be careful here and do not suggest she NEEDS a shower!

13. If you do bring a meal, make sure you serve it and clean it up. 

14. Offer to walk and feed pets, and if you are really nice clean a litter box!

15. If she is nursing, her eating habits are almost more important now then when she was pregnant. Offer to stop at the store and pick things up. Nutrition bars, water, fresh fruit, yogurt and nuts are all good things to have on hand for her.


If you really want to show how much you care, purchase one of my services! Working moms especially, really want to focus their leave on baby. Not cleaning, cooking, shopping, party planning, childcare placement, nanny interviews, and who to use for a newborn shoot! I have done all the work and research; my packages offer vendor discounts that you will not see elsewhere. I can accommodate any mother’s unique needs so that she can enjoy this time with her baby. So if your best friend from college is having a baby and you cannot drop everything to help her- hiring me will be a godsend! Or if you daughter or daughter-in-law is in need of help... she will love you for this!



Stephanie Antoinette 
480-717-2795
byVictoriaAntoinette@gmail.com 



Monday, October 29, 2012

Registry Assistance

One of the services I offer is a "Customized Baby Registry"... trust me, you do not want to waste your money on things you really don't need or won't use!

Here are a few of my favorites~

The Breast Friend nursing pillow as seen below. If you plan on nursing I highly suggest registering for this pillow vs. The Boppy (also seen below).  The Breast Friend gives you and baby a proper angle for breast feeding! The Boppy, or ones like it, are more of a multipurpose pillow. I had registered for The Boppy and the day Ella was born the nurse told my husband to go get the The Breast Friend immediately! It has a flatter surface so that the babies head is elevated to the breast better for feeding. It also claps aroung your waste for a nice snug fit, and if you have to get up and move, you can without unlatching your baby from feeding. Now since I ended up with both anyway, I found uses for the The Boppy. It was good for when Kiana would hold Ella, or to prop Ella up before she knew how to roll over. Get both if you would like, but if you are breast feeding make sure you get The Breast Friend! 

My Brest Friend Pillow


The Boppy Pillow

Blankets... OH MY- the endless selection of receiving blankets & swaddlers! They come in all shapes; sizes, materials and prints which make it a bit overwhelming to know which one is best (and at which age). As Ella got bigger other blankets worked better, but for this blog we are talking about 0-3 month stage. I ended up with an entire drawer full of blankets, and in the end these were the only ones I used for the first 4 months. 


The Miracle Blanket® 

This blanket was fantastic for swaddling!! It takes a little getting used to it since it has the pre-made flaps, but it tucks nicely and gives baby a secure feeling. I would suggest registering for two so you can keep one in the wash! This blanket is really only good for the swaddle, so after the first four months you will not need to use it as much. However, it keeps baby's hands and feet tucked in perfectly!



aden™ by aden + anais® 



I really like this blanket, like the one above, this blanket give baby a great swaddle! It comes in several different prints, and is a little more versatile then the Miracle Blanket. You can use this to cover car seats while out and about, and since it is so big, babies can lay on the floor with it for tummy time! It is very breathable, so if your baby is born during the hotter seasons this is a great options for outside. Again, register for a couple of these!

Both are a bit more spendy then your typical receiving blanket, but it is much better to have 4 blankets that you use, then a drawer full of ones you don't! 

A couple other tips as you register, or for friends and family who want to buy gifts! 

Your baby will not necessarily be in a 0-3 month size for the first 0-3 months! So make sure you don't buy a boatload of clothes your baby could end up growing out of faster then you think. During these first few months your baby really only needs onesies, cotton pants & jackets, and some socks. You end up swaddling them a lot so all those expensive cute clothes I would wait on! Tell grandma to start buying 3-6 months sizes or even 6 months up! 

Burp clothes, I had a stack of the cloth diapers on hand for spit ups, messes etc... But the one I used most was the aden burpy bib 

A white noise machine!!!!! I cannot stress this enough and I didn't even break down and get one till Ella was one. It is a lifesaver; forget the CD's, the app's on your phone, and the light up musical mobiles! A simple noise machine that can stay where baby sleeps, and you can take it with you when you travel, is all you need!  I got mine at Bed Bath & Beyond as seen here.


Marpac The Original Sound Conditioner™


Registering for baby can be a daunting task for new moms. You get caught up in all the cute stuff, and you get tons of advice (wanted or not) from everyone who knows you are expecting! The thing is, registry does have some basic guidelines, but needs & wants are different for every mom. All of my packages include this service, I also offer this as an A la carté option.



For more information, or to purchase a service please email me at-

ByVictoriaAntoinette@gmail.com or call me at 480-717-2795

www.JLVbebeconcierge.com

Stephanie Antoinette