More 'Must-Haves' for the pregnant mama!!

So I touched on a few of my favorite 'Must-Haves', but here are just a few more.

A good pair of leggings can go a long way, you can pair this with a nice blouse to dress it up- or a comfy knit top for a more casual look. I had the same kind in a few different colors and wore them all the time!!

Here is what I had, I went with the crop leggings but you can go for full length as well!

Secret Fit Belly® Jersey Knit Maternity Crop Leggings

Pregnancy body pillow, if you are pregnant and do not have one of these you are missing out! During the last trimester it becomes incredibly difficult to get comfortable. It is recommended that you sleep on your left side, and having a body pillow can really help with getting a good night sleep (again if only you didn't have to get up to use the bathroom 20 times). When I was pregnant with Ella, I had extreme back pain. I am not referring to the normal pregnancy back pain due to weight gain, I actually had a bulging disc that herniated and was pushing against nerves. It wasn't until after I had her that I realized how bad my situation was and when she was 9 months old I had to have surgery. So for me, if I could sleep for 30- 45 minutes at a time without having to shift, it was a miracle! This pillow was my saving grace and worth every penny!!

The Snoozer Full Body Pillow- $60 at Motherhood Maternity 

Since it is not recommended you take any sort aspirin or pain relievers during pregnancy, I sought out some other products to help with the immense back and leg pain I had. I tried several different kinds, some that really smelled, others that left my skin burning. In the end I did find one that worked really well, I highly recommend it. Biofreeze- Get a tube, it is inexpensive and sold at most all pharmacies, Target and Wal-Mart if you are feeling brave! 

I had talked about "Belly Bars" in my last blog, but I wanted to go into a bit more detail on that. This all-natural bar is full of folic acid, omega 3's and iron. It is sold at Whole Foods and I have seen them at Motherhood Maternity (boy do I plug them a lot ha). Anyhow, the nausea in the first trimester really does a number on me! I can barely keep the prenatal vitamins down, so I would take them at night. With Ella, the only thing I could stomach was fresh fruit, nuts and bread... until the end when I had an obsession with chilidogs and guacamole. The Belly Bars were a great way to get some goodness in me, and they tasted really good! 

I encourage any feedback, and let me know what some of your favorites are!!

Stephanie Antoinette 

Pregnancy Must-Haves!

For some, being pregnant doesn't always mean you get that 'glow' everyone talks about. Unfortunately not all of us are blessed with just a cute round belly! Some of us (me included) have unsightly skin changes and we gain weight EVERYWHERE! We surely do not look, or feel like the goddess everyone talks about.

Here are some of my personal tips on how to keep yourself looking, and feeling your best during these long 9 months!

Water: I cannot emphasize enough the importance of consuming enough water when pregnant. You should be drinking plenty before and after, especially if you are breastfeeding, but while pregnant it is crucial! Besides the obvious of keeping you and baby hydrated, it also helps with the dry & itchy skin. Drinking plenty of water can also prevent water retention, sounds odd right?! It's true, drinking the recommended 8, 8 ounce glasses a day can prevent the puffiness! Water also naturally detoxes your body, toss in a lemon or fresh fruit to spruce up the taste!!

Moisturize: If you live in Arizona then moisturizing and drinking water should already be part of your routine, but during these 9 months pump it up. Make sure you are applying lotion to your whole body after each shower; maybe even have hubby rub some on your tired & swollen feet! Some of my favorites were:

Eucerin Calming Itch-relief- I would be extremely itchy all the time! In order to prevent myself from tearing my skin apart with scratching I would apply this... in ample amounts!

Bio Oil- I still use this! Nothing can prevent stretch marks entirely since that has to do with the elasticity of your skin from the inside, but this can help them from getting out of control.

Then any yummy smelling peppermint foot cream for my feet!


Humidifier: I would get so stuffed up do the build up of hormones that I could barely breathe. It is called Rhinitis of Pregnancy.  It didn't help in the last trimester when I had a baby pushing on my lungs and diaphragm either. So at night I would prop myself in almost a seated position and turn on the humidifier. This made it slightly easier to breathe... now if only I didn't have to get up 20 times a night to go to the bathroom.

Make sure you have a least a couple pairs of cute and tailored maternity pants & tops. Make sure the tops are long and go below the belly... PLEASE! A thin cardigan is always nice to have to cover your arms and sides if you are not happy with how they are growing ha! Get yourself a good bra to 'grow' with- your belly isn't the only thing that will be getting bigger! You do not need to go out and drop hundreds of dollars to achieve this- unless you can afford to... then have at it! Maternity clothes are sold in way more stores then when I was first pregnant with my oldest! Old Navy, Target, Motherhood Maternity all has great options! Dress up your outfit with cute ballet flats, a scarf and bag.

Check out these cute options for under $50-

Indigo Blue Secret Fit Belly® Skinny Leg Maternity Jeans (Lose the heels)

3/4 Sleeve Empire Seam Maternity Tunic 

Make sure you pack your bag with mints or hard candies to fight of nausea. Snacks like nuts, belly bars or trail mix to keep yourself from starving if you are on the go. A bottle of water, and lip-gloss to take full advantage of those full lips you have! 

I will continue on this subject, but this will get you started! 

What is a baby concierge?

By now you have seen my posts, pictures and blogs about my new business... I am still getting the question of, "What is it that you do exactly?"

The catch phrase to describe this service is that I am like a wedding coordinator, but for all things baby! Of course, that is the simplest way of putting it because there is SO SO much more that this concierge will offer.  From the moment you decide to have a baby (and after the excitement wears off) there often is a feeling of being overwhelmed! This is not just for first time parents either-- products, procedures and births are different with each child. Not to mention that after you have one child your time becomes more and more limited, and your needs increase as well. Unlike a wedding, where once the wedding is complete a coordinator's job is done, having a baby is an ongoing event for the rest of your life!

J'aime la vie assists right from the beginnning with pediatrician, OB and/or Doula placement, childcare/nanny placement, and nutrition/ fitness consults.  We also will design a customized birth plan & baby registry with products that work for you! Researching strollers, car seats, high chairs and what toys are best can be enough to drive a person mad! I have done it all, and I continue to keep up with all the consumer reports and actual 'parent tried and true' testimonies to make sure you do not waste your money or time.

J'aime la vie can organize and decorate your nursery, baby proof your house, get training for your pets if you are worried about how they may feel with a crying child in the home! I can set up house cleaning services, grocery store runs before birth, after and beyond.  I have access to the valley's top photographers, bakeries, florists, and more to help you create the baby shower of your dreams!! I don't stop there... I plan religious ceremonies, 'baby-moons', birthday parties, gender reveal parties, and new parent showers!! I will design invitations; baby announcements and can even create a photo baby book for you or for you to give as a gift.  I also offer an adoption transition service for those parents who may be taking in a child from any age! One of my favorite services I will be offering is a bed-rest concierge... for those moms who are not allowed to get up and do the things they need to, I will!

Every family's needs and situation is different, so I offer A la Carte options as well as customized packages! These services are great to give as a gift to a friend or daughter!

I planned my baby shower on my own; I was new here to Arizona from Minnesota. My friends felt helpless in not being able to help me put this together... so what a great gift to give a friend! You can have as little or as much control in the process as you would like. I am not here to take away this special time for you, I am here to take away the stress and give you an incredible event on your budget. I will always be available by phone or email to all my clients at any time.

Stephanie Anotinette
480-717-2795
ByVictoriaAntoinette@gmail.com

Do I really need a birth plan?

What is a birth plan? 

"The birth plan is a written list of your preferences to be used as a guide for how you would like your labor and delivery to go. As labor can be unpredictable, you may need to deviate from this plan at times during labor." This is according to the Health Library.

One of the most important things to remember about a birth plan is, it is just that... a plan. No one, no matter what background you have or how many children you have given birth to, can determine how your birth will go. However, it is important to have a plan! A guide, if you will, of what your wishes are in best & worst case scenarios. This doesn't have to be a typed out and laminated report (unless you are a bit OCD like me), but a clear, concise one-page document will do. Sharing this with your spouse, doctor, doula or midwife will ensure everyone is on the same page and help to create a positive experience for you & baby! 

That is the easy part; the more challenging part is determining which plan works best for you. Mothers today are far more educated on the various ways to deliver. There are c-sections, vaginal births, water births, home births, midwives, doulas, doctors, drugs, no drugs, and so forth. It can be incredibly overwhelming for any mother, no matter how many children they may have had already. Our bodies, and outlook on these matters change as we learn more, age, and have more children. 

The births of my two daughters were vastly different, which goes to show your plans can change with each birth! With my first daughter, I was 2 weeks late and in labor for over 30 hours... 18 of which was considered hard labor. I wanted to give birth in a hospital, to me it was just more comforting to have medical support nearby if needed. My plan consisted of only two things; I wanted an epidural, and wanted to avoid a c-section. I was terrified, young and in an incredible amount of pain.  The doctors were swarming me like vultures towards the end of my labor; they wanted me to get the c-section. Had my labor gone on much longer I would have had to, but in the end I was able to push her out.

With my second birth, I wanted a more natural approach. I still wanted to give birth in a hospital, but I did not want any drugs. Since I had such a traumatic experience the first time around, my husband and I decided to bring in a doula to assist. I think one of the most common misconceptions about a doula is that she is doing what the husband should. That couldn't be further from the truth! I don't care if you are super dad, or if you faint at the sight of a drop of blood... a doula makes the birthing experience a more calming one. Greta, my doula, has 30 years experience in assisting births. She worked along side my OB, and was an advocate for my husband and I during the labor!  With my back issues (later blog) I opted for an elective induction at 39 weeks. In hindsight I would have tried harder to wait because I believe that this prolonged my labor. I was on a petocin drip all night and my body was not dialating. 

By the next morning I had not progressed much so they wanted to break my water to get me to dilate. The nurses were strongly encouraging me to get an epidural since breaking your water will cause your contractions to intensify. At first I declined this so my doula could continue to assist me in different positions that would help me naturally dilate. After a few more hours I had only opened another 3cm (which left me at 6cm). For birth to occur they need you at 10cm and to be fully effaced. 

The nurses could not give me anymore petocin, and physically my body could not handle labor much longer. In the end I agreed to the epidural, which sped things along within a matter of an hour. I was very frustrated that I was unable to fulfill my plan of "no-drugs", however in the end all that was important was that we were healthy and safe! 

So as I said, it is good to have a plan... but you need to be flexible with that plan. Sometimes you will need a c-section, or maybe the home birth you dreamed of is just not going to work. The good news is with each birth you typically get a new plan. If you had a c-section the first time, you can try for a v-back the next time. Birth is a beautiful experience no matter what way your baby comes into the world! No matter which plan you choose or end up with for that matter... it is the gift you get in the end! 

As always, consulting your OB/GYN to make sure you know all the health risks is most important!

At J'aime la vie we offer a consultation that will take you through all the different options you have and match that with your wants & needs! 

Stephanie Antoinette

480-717-2795

LoveByVictoriaAntoinette.com 

Breast is best?!?

From the moment new parents announce they are expecting, other moms telling them ‘breast is best’ bombard them. The American Academy of Pediatrics says "babies should be breastfed exclusively for the first 6 months". There is no denying the benefits of breast-feeding your little one, but what if you can't? I am not talking about parents who have adopted and have no interest in getting breast milk from a milk bank. 

As a mother of two beautiful girls (my oldest 13 and little one just turned 2) my experience was a little different then I thought it would be. With my oldest Kiana, I was completely uncomfortable with the whole idea of breastfeeding to be honest. Being a bit younger, and knowing I would have to go back to work immediately, I just felt it best to start her on formula from the beginning. I remember in the hospital after she was born, the nurses kept asking me over and over if I was absolutely sure if I wanted to give her formula. At times they made me feel ashamed of my decision, however in the end I felt formula was the best option. Kiana never got sick until, once when she was 4 with a mild fever, and then when she was 8 with a double ear infection. 

With my second, I had a completely different outlook on breastfeeding. I read every book, article and blog I could get my hands on about the benefits and best ways to breastfeed. Everything I read made it seem like it would all come naturally, that my body would know what to do when the time came. I spoke with friends and family who had breastfed, a few said it may be slightly uncomfortable at first but assured me a woman's body was made for this! I did have some fears about the pain, and what if my milk supply wasn't strong, nontheless in the end I felt prepared! I had my doula there with me, and a hospital full of nurses and lactation consultants. Then the day came, Ella was born and immediately I asked if I could feed her! My doula and one of the nurses helped me get Ella in position, with a pinch to the nipple her little mouth was on (so I thought). For the next 24 hours in the hospital I had nurses shifting Ella and myself into various holds, the football hold seemed to work best. I am a larger breasted woman, they were far larger then her tiny little head to be exact! Ella did manage to get milk here and there, but was waking often to get more... my milk was still coming in. 

By the time I was ready to take Ella home my nipple area already was badly bruised, 'no worries' they told me “it gets easier.” It was finally time to go home and the fear was settling in, how would I ever figure out how to feed her on my own if I hadn't been able to manage it in the hospital with help?!? The day after I got home my situation was getting worse. Ella was clearly not getting enough to eat and by now my nipples were bleeding! So I called my doula, she came out again... showed me some more latch holds and I continued on. Ella was waking every hour to hour and a half to feed, I would cringe to the bone every time she 'chomped' on. I did everything I was told by taking her off gently with my fingers and re-latching her until it felt better.

Feeding time became the worst parts of the day, which is pretty rough considering how many times you have to feed a newborn. Against all advice, I would slip a bottle in every now and then so I could rest my nipples. I hate to sound so graphic but it was literally a bloody mess for both of us during feeding times. What I have described so far is mostly the physical pain I felt, emotionally I was not much better! I felt like a complete failure... how could every mother since the beginning of time manage to breastfeed, but not me? By day 5 I started to feel sick, I thought I was coming down with the flu, fever, chills, aches, etc... So I packed my sweet baby up and headed to my doctor. We sat in the waiting room for nearly two hours (thank goodness I packed a bottle since I wouldn't dare a feeding in public) and finally we made our way back to the exam room. 

I explained my symptoms of a fever, breast pain and redness on my chest, chills, aches and so forth. After a few "hmmm's" and "well I am not totally sure" he tells me I have a virus. I get a script for an antibiotic and head home. As the night went on my fever went from 102, to 103 to 105+, streaks of red were coming down my chest and I thought I was burning from the inside out. My husband had had enough, so he packed up the girls and we made the 30 minute drive to the nearest ER at midnight! The diagnosis.... Mastitis. I still continued to breast feed (per the doctors instructions) as much as I could but at day 7 I was physically and mentally beat. I was dreading the most precious time to connect with my newborn, feeding time. Ella was hungry, I was in pain and feeling like the worst mother on the planet... and none of this was natural to me. So I bought a pump, and not just any old pump, one of the best I could find, the Madela Pump in Style Advanced:

Relief at last!!! I still was not getting enough milk in, even after following the diet recco's and taking Fenugreek. so I would still supplement with formula every now and then. 

So what am I saying here?! I am by no means discouraging you from breastfeeding; I know that breast milk has wonderful benefits that a lot of formulas cannot offer. I am simply telling the other side of the story, the side I never heard or read! No matter what your feeding decision is, you should not be made to feel ashamed or guilty about it. The formulas on the market today are incredible and bottle-feeding can be a great option for both mom and dad. If you are suffering as much as I did,  my advice would be to get yourself a good pump! Now,  pumping every 3-4 hours on top of feeding can be pretty tricky, (especially if you are working like me) but if it is important to you, you will make it work! 

After all I went through, I still plan on attempting to breastfeed again with our next baby. Every baby latches differently, and for whatever reason Ella and I just couldn't make it work. The times I did get her on a good latch felt incredible... I felt AWESOME to have that connection with her. However feeling so awful when it wasn't working was no benefit to her or myself. Breastfeeding is not easy for everyone, and it may not even be an option for some. At the end of the day, being happy, healthy and giving your child the nutrients he/she needs is really all that matters! 

For more information or questions please contact me directly at ByVictoriaAntoinette@gmail.com or call me at 480-717-2795.

Stephanie Antoinette~